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First, let me say that I don’t think Comcast is a terrible company with intractable customer service.  Their Customer Guarantee is progressive.  My view is they are big and they do things on massive scales that sometimes create customer problems.  My experience is they have differing (i.e., bad at times) customer service representative capabilities.  Good ones will listen, help, and do things within the myriad of solutions available.  Bad ones will make customers feel like they are talking to a rock; nothing happens and infuriation sets in.

My problem stems from a downgrade in service.  I was not notified, in advance or at all, and my bills are the same.  I went weeks without any service.  Poor customer service exasperated the problem.  It is still unresolved.  After seventeen years with this company (and its predecessors) I am seriously thinking it is time to sever the relationship.

The change in service occurred either two or three weeks ago (I am unsure of the number of weeks).  The signal on my large-screen LCD went out–it just said “scrambled.”  I didn’t call Comcast because I assumed customer service would be a nightmare and I really didn’t want people traipsing through my house or yard.  After a couple of days I called and received a recording message saying (approximately) ‘we are aware of outages in your area; you cannot speak with anyone about this; if you like we will call you when service is restored.’  About two hours later I received a call with an automated message indicating service had been restored.  Nothing had changed on my end.

So I called.  The first representative I spoke with had no idea what I was talking about.  She said “There are outages in your area.”  (There have not been any weather problems.)  I asked to speak with a manager or supervisor.  I was on hold for fifteen minutes.  He too (I have his name but am not including it here; I would have to find it) didn’t know anything about my problem.  He said “You have to use a box” (see below).  I said “Please don’t argue with me.  Could someone please look into it and call me back.”  He said ‘sure/fine’ and verified my phone number.  I never heard from anyone.  That was it:  No Comcast response.

After researching the issue, trying to re-set channels, and going for weeks without service I uncovered the problem:  Comcast had scrambled stations going into my home.  Where no set-top box was previously necessary on a TV with a digital tuner now one was needed.  Some three years earlier a Comcast technician in my home (there for a different problem) showed me how to use a digital TV wihout a box.  I had since rearranged my living room (cords, plugs, etc.) and purchased a new TV to utilize this service.  Now it was gone.  I had to figure this out–and now make completely different arrangements–all on my own.

The use of a box–again, Comcast isn’t an entirely unresponsive company, they provide them for free–is really not an option for me for this TV.  There is no outlet to plug it in; the chords are an awful mess; my TV remote doesn’t work; it is nuisance to use two remotes for TV vs. HDMI, frequent picture resizing, muting, etc.; and, basically, up-down channels are useless because there are so many channels in between I don’t receive!  To repeat, many channels are different sizes (they don’t fill the screen).  I cannot tell the picture resolution–it seems worse than before–because it isn’t going through my TV’s tuner.  Now I discovered a new problem:  audio is out of sync on certain channels at times (a problem I never had before).

The problem is A)  I don’t like this new set-up (with a box) at all and B)  I feel dissatisfied and forced into it.  I am paying for it and shouldn’t have to spend hours trying to deal with Comcast representatives to resolve it.

There are solutions.  What will Comcast do?  These could include removing the scrambling to my house, bill credits, “replacement” services, making all the pictures uniform, etc.  Another, ancillary request is provide one person and direct contact information for service for this issue.  Does Comcast want to keep me as a customer?  That is the question now.  What solution will be provided.

THE LESSONS – In a technology-based business product changes and upgrades are necessary for the future and new customers.  A key is how to please and retain current customers.  Notice and choices must be provided.  “Grandfathering,” or similar substitutions should be offered if possible.  In terms of customer service, obviously the ideal is uniform and competent.  Promises must be kept.  If a customer takes the time to call that should be viewed as a required call to action.

EDIT:  COMCAST RESPONSE – They gave me three months credit (free) going forward.

The Judybats, Our Story

The Ocean Blue, Ballerina

The Waterboys, The Whole of the Moon

Mary-Chapin Carpenter, 10,000 Miles

Stones in the Road:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ye-IldZ6WTQ

A Matter of Your Pride:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AUs00xjPs0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUZGHAw4Yho

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqRo3pRH1_g

Suzy:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ce9kGLhAee0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUTFWqkFf98

1. Big Head Todd & The Monsters, Bittersweet
2. Bonnie Rait, Have A Heart
3. Bruce Springsteen, Streets of Philadelphia
4. Cat Stevens, Fill My Eyes
5. Dave Matthews Band, Typical Situation
6. David Gray, Babylon
7. David Wilcox, Eye of the Hurricane
8. Dion, Abraham, Martin, and John
9. Dream Academy, Life in a Northern Town
10. Duncan Shiek, Barely Breathing
11. Eurythmics, Here Comes the Rain Again
12. Everything But The Girl, One Place
13. Fleetwood Mac, Sara
14. Harry Nilsson, Everbody’s Talkin’
15. Indigo Girls, Hammer and a Nail
16. Jackson Browne, In the Shape of a Heart
17. Joni Mitchell, Chelsea Morning
18. Joni Mitchell, Coyote
19. Linda Rondstadt and the Stone Ponies, Different Drum
20. Lisa Loeb, I Do
21. Maria McKee, Show Me Heaven
22. Mary-Chapin Carpenter, 10,000 Miles
23. Mary-Chapin Carpenter, This is Love
24. Michelle Shocked, Anchorage
25. Neil Young, Sugar Mountain
26. Rikki Lee Jones, Flying Cowboys
27. Seal, Crazy
28. Seekers, Georgy Girl
29. Shawn Colvin, Round of Blues
30. Simon & Garfunkel, Mrs. Robinson
31. Sophie B. Hawkins, As I Lay Me Down
32. Suzanne Cianni, Velocity of Love
33. Suzanne Vega, Marlene on the Wall
34. The Youngbloods, Let’s Get Together
35. Til Tuesday, Voices Carry
36. Van Morrison, Tupelo Honey

Current Headset Load

1. Billy Joel, Captain Jack
2. Billy Joel, Say Goodbye to Hollywood
3. Blue Oyster Cult, Don’t Fear the Reaper
4. Bob Dylan, Blood on the Tracks
5. Bob Mould, See a Little Light
6. Boston, More Than a Feeling
7. Bruce Springsteen, Born to Run
8. Bruce Springsteen, Tunnel of Love
9. Chicago, Old Days
10. Coldplay, Clocks
11. Counting Crows, Accidentally in Love
12. Counting Crows, Rain King
13. David & David, Swallowed by the Cracks
14. Echo and the Bunnymen, Bring on the Dancing Horses
15. Freddy Jones Band, Take the Time
16. Gin Blossoms, Found Out About You
17. Goo Goo Dolls, Slide
18. Head East, Never Been Any Reason
19. John Mayer, Why Georgia
20. John Waite, Change
21. Johnny Nash, I Can See Clearly Now
22. Journey, Only the Young
23. Letters to Cleo, Cruel to Be Kind
24. Lisa Loeb, I Do
25. Mark Knopfler & Emmylou Harris, This is Us
26. Men at Work, Overkill
27. Neil Young, Sugar Mountain
28. Nina Simone, Sinnerman
29. Peter Murphy, Cuts You Up
30. Peter Murphy, Indigo Eyes
31. Peter Tosh, Here Comes the Sun
32. Rush, Limelight
33. Sophie B. Hawkins, As I Lay Me Down
34. Steeley Dan, Dr. Wu
35. Stevie Wonder, He’s Mistra Know it All
36. The Church, Almost With You
37. The Church, Metropolis
38. The Church, Reptile
39. The Church, Tantalized
40. The Moody Blues, I Know You’re Out There Somewhere
41. The Plimsouls, A Million Miles Away
42. The Who, Love Reign O’er Me
43. The Who, Pure and Easy
44. The Waterboys, The Whole of the Moon

1. New Order, Bizarre Love Triangle
2. Allman Brothers, Sweet Melissa
3. Allman Brothers, Blue Sky
4. America, California Revisited
5. Bob Dylan, Blood on the Tracks
6. Bob Seger, Hollywood Nights
7. Bob Seger, Roll Me Away
8. Bodeans, Closer to Free
9. Boston, More Than a Feeling
10. Coldplay, Speed of Sound
11. Counting Crows, Rain King
12. Crowded House, Recurring Dream
13. Doobie Brothers, South City Midnight Lady
14. Elton John, Grey Seal
15. Fleetwood Mac, Bleed to Love Her
16. Fleetwood Mac, Go Your Own Way
17. Gin Blossoms, Follow You Down
18. Gin Blossoms, Found Out About You
19. Grateful Dead, Uncle John’s Band
20. Joe Walsh, In the City
21. John Mellencamp, Minutes to Memories
22. Moody Blues, I Know You’re Out There Somewhere
23. New Radicals, Someday We’ll Know
24. New Radicals, You Get What You Give
25. Pete Yorn, Strange Condition
26. Pretenders, Night in My Veins
27. Pretenders, Only Human on the Inside
28. Psychodelic Furs, The Ghost in You
29. R.E.M., South Central Rain
30. Rasberries, Go All the Way
31. Rick Springfield, Jessie’s Girl
32. Rush, Limelight
33. The Church, Under the Milky Way
34. The Judybats, Our Story
35. The La’s, There She Goes
36. The Who, Athena

The Ocean Blue

Christine is a woman I met on OKCupid.  It was fun communicating with someone from Newcastle upon Tyne in northern England.  She and I had psychology, anthropology, and social sciences in common.  She went to great schools–Manchester and Harvard.  Her writing was smart and fun.

She also was part, or half of a gross marriage.  They separated while moving a family with three kids from St. Louis to Scotland.  It took five years of apparent acrimony for an eventual divorce in 2008.  Now, after five more years she is selling her house, car, furniture, and moving to the United States.  Her youngest child is seventeen (and I don’t know where); a daughter attends UNC and will move to Denver while a son now lives in Phoenix.

Despite mutual interests and even affection for each other we were at odds.  She wrote a long biopic of her marriage.  “No nothing.”  I was trying to communicate and help.  Basically, she would have none of it.

*          *          *

For some time my curiosity has been why can’t women around my age deal with a life being single and on their own:

Some (women) can, some can’t, and some are willing to try.  The differences in gender roles are real.  The role of being a professional or breadwinner as opposed to a homemaker is significant.  For about the last ten years I have in large been in the position of homemaker, albeit without kids.  I like it.  I prefer it to working every day.  But it is tough to break out of and become a real contributor to society.  This is of course unless you have practiced, and continuously learned and tried to do it.

Back to Christine…  I picked-up the phone and called, something some women will not do.  I was surprised.   She was nice and I liked her laugh, which was frequent.  She was concerned, almost overwhelmed, by the huge and unusual task of selling everything and moving to a city she had never been to before.  She struck me as being not really in control of the whole situation.

Christine’s profile on the online dating site mentions Pride and Prejudice as her favorite film (I assume she means the 1995 BBS mini-series as this is generally considered superior to the 2004 film).  Christine also indicates an affection for the name Darcy/D’arcy.  Pride and Prejudice is two-hundred year old fiction.  Romance and fantasy is fine, but that is what it is.

It, this whole thing, is not about equal, close, unequivocally-loving by people who want to excel and achieve.

I feel I have made some progress on this gender role thing.  Throughout I have openly stated that I would like to find a woman who will create a life with me.  This is way more dubious than I thought.  (“Dubious isn’t the right word, nor is “controversial.”)  I have always thought that women and men can do the same things, even be the same if they wanted to.  I still think this can happen but it is much more rare than I thought.  I have been wrong.  I have been hard-headed and stubborn.

I have met women who more or less fit this ideal of mine but for other, unrelated reasons it has not worked.  They had a strong desire to have a successful relationship and be with a man (me); they had a can-do attitude, as well as a desire to put other (perhaps less conventional things for a woman) first.  Perhaps I got hung-up on the wrong things.

For me the problem is that if I just put a normal profile out there I get all kinds of interest from a slew of women I am ambivalent about.  Usually I try and communicate and it doesn’t work.  I feel stress because we are at this tacit, ingrained impasse.  I don’t want to stereotype or denigrate but I feel they are average; I believe they can have more but they don’t see it.  They don’t have my ambition and they don’t get me; or, rather, they do but they just…  The status quo is okay.  It isn’t wrong it is just different:  They are happy with the kids (in the past; now grown and gone, yet still of course family), parents, ex, neighbors, etc. life that is not me.  I want to a) have a really close relationship and b) change the world.

I need to keep telling myself that.  It isn’t wrong it is just different.

There has to be a better way to market to it.