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Poor Jane Bashara

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American Greed Monday.

This one was a “Deadly Rich” episode about Jane Bashara.

552 Middlesex Road in Grosse Pointe Park is worth about $400,000 and the taxes are almost $11K.  It is not far from Lake St. Clair, which is desirable, but it is also only a few blocks from Alter Road, which is the border with Detroit.

Bob Bashara is a gangster, a thug, and a con artist.

In terms of the case, it is really hard to cut through to the things that matter.  Bob Bashara is as dumb and as guilty as all those other people who think they are going to kill their spouse in the living room and get away with it (e.g., Pamela Smart).  They’re going to act like nothing happened and lie to all the cameras and reporters.  They are going to fool everyone.

Why do they think like that?

The most important quote from this week of Greed is this:

He is a psychopath.  You cannot treat a psychopath.

It was Dr. Michael Stone (Columbia) who said this to a police investigator, referring to Dr. Robert Bierenbaum.  He is the one who wrote the Tarasoff letter.  It was a “duty to warn” letter directed specifically at Gail.  It is extraordinary that he could reach such accurate conclusions after, I believe, about 2 hours of sessions.

“Jane Bashara graduated from Mount Clemens High School. She most recently worked as a marketing manager for an energy consulting company in Detroit after working for Detroit Edison for 25 years.”  I forget the name of her then/last employer.  That explains the 401K.  She went “back to work” when the Detroit real estate market collapsed and Bob turned-out to be such a deadbeat.  Apparently he took $10K out early and without her knowledge, that’s how much of a loser he was.

Therein lies a real key:  the Detroit real estate market.  In a different life Robert Bashara would have been rich and powerful.

As almost-always, shows such as Deadly Rich and Dateline have extremely high production values.  They’ve got that genre down pat and they really know how to tell stories.  But in this one they have things a little wrong or misleading, especially the NBC Dateline version (there is also a local, Detroit one).  Grosse Pointe isn’t great and it isn’t about power and privilege based on the address.  The whole thing is pretty much decayed and still decaying.  There are some wealthy and powerful people, and beautiful homes, but they are the exception.

Similarly, in the last 30 years there, Bob Bashara definitely was not rich, powerful, or worthy of respect.  He was a slumlord working in a very limited area, driving around and partying.  Jane–even her name is boring–earned the money and raised the kids.  Plus she took care of the old Grosse Pointe Park house and she paid the taxes.

Rotary Club, give me a break.  If there ever was a “Grosse Pointe,” and there was at one time, it was based on old money primarily related to the auto industry.  Lawyers from Lebanon were usually not invited.  But Bashara wasn’t even that.  In everything I have read about him and the crime I haven’t heard of a college degree or a job.

He was living a propped-up life and he knew it.  He was nothing but a desperate criminal.  No one, including his kids, with any credibility has come to his defense.


I Bet the Pizza is Great

That is what I have to add to the story:  I grew up there.

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January 22nd, 2019 at 5:12 pm

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Torrey Green

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the stories behind the accusations

Annaleece Merrill is someone I don’t want to mess with.  Or should I say mess around with.  Bad joke.  She pops-up quite a bit on Google.

I’m not entirely sure I follow her journey.  I think religion is a part of it but she does not write about that.  Three jobs is descriptive and there is nothing wrong with industrious effort.  And you cannot go wrong through education.

“I learned that I could use the coping skills that I had learned to help girls that are currently going through unplanned pregnancies,” she writes and that provides some direction.

And I fear that studying a little psychology doesn’t qualify you.  It could be difficult given that you love your birth daughter but she is adopted by another person or family.

The Torrey Green story is an interesting/awful one.  There is a lot about it on on the web.  I remember Auston Robertson at Michigan State.  Never have I seen such an obvious predator and the case against him.

Very sadly, he is probably going to spend most of his life in prison and that is a result of our (society’s) inability to protect ourselves from him.  It is more a sickness than a crime.  Hooray for the women because they have learned to stand-up for themselves and hopefully protect themselves too.

For Green it isn’t love, attraction, or even dating.  It is like football in that it is aggressive if not violent.  Texting someone you don’t even know for months is very strange.  The whole thing was as premeditated and continuous as can be.  What really was the goal or problem with Torrey Green?

A very telling sign of something really out of kilter is saying afterward “Don’t report it.”  You shouldn’t have to say that.  You certainly shouldn’t plan to say it or say it repeatedly as an ordinary matter after a “date.”

What it means, if you follow college sports, is if he gets in trouble he could be kicked-off the team.  He would lose his scholarship and his “career” as a student-athlete.  He wasn’t even a starter for the most part.  He was not an NFL prospect.

Parts of this story stick out.  First is the long-time predatory behavior which probably goes back to high school.  Then there is the intransigence of the university and police department (see below).  Something else is the unique atmosphere; this is Utah, not East Lansing.  And, as mentioned previously, what really is the mental disorder that Torrey Green is dealing with?

As for Logan, Utah, what is probably going to happen–what should happen–is Utah State University will be sued for failing to provide adequate and appropriate Title IX resources.  Hopefully the sheriff’s department will receive a wake-up call too.

The women?  Of course they are victims.  Just look at the trauma.  First, report it even if you know they are not going to do anything.  Next, rest easy that he is behind bars and know that your community is now aware.  You are aware too.  Go ahead and write on if it helps.  You survived and eventually there was support.

Remember the coping lessons?  Per Annaleece, things can and will get better.


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January 21st, 2019 at 10:42 am

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First, two things and then maybe more.

There is a woman I know who I learned a lot from and I tried to help.  I contacted the social workers and psychologists involved to no avail.  I want to get this off my chest.  Our last “talk” was barely talking.  It was really just two people saying loudly what was on their mind.  It was not constructive and there was no point.  From her all I really remember is “What about him, what about him!” referring to her ex and the source of all that ruin.

I knew what was coming.  “What about you?”

Is that narcissism?  In the court system and in a big part of her life she got killed.  For some reason it just didn’t work.

And the thing is, it is completely different when one is on their own.  Kids and a spouse (and dependent family members) make all the difference in the world.

Second, I wrote a story about 17 years ago about alcoholism in my family.  It was especially for my siblings, to whom I sent copies.  It was pretty upbeat and there was a happy ending, but that part was fiction of course.  For me it was a reckoning as I chose a life away from that; I understood addiction and I decided against it.  Obviously I had to also choose a lifestyle managing and confronting a family that would not change.  Selfish?  I had to for my own survival.  I made every effort not to hurt anyone else in the process.

For years and still to this day I pondered the notion of How can anyone be so cruel?  How can someone not pay attention?  Only recently have I realized that with alcoholics you are dealing with only a portion of a person because another large part of them is consumed by the addiction.  They’re not whole, and you are fighting for a portion of a portion of their attention, and what is left may be jaded too.  Why no attention?  My attention is consumed elsewhere.  I’m not doing it because it is fun, occasional, or social, I am doing it to reach a different state and place for my attention.

The two are related, I think.

Third bullet and to no one’s immediate concern whatsoever.  In online dating I will reply when I know what to say.  I warned you this last part isn’t worth reading for anyone but myself.


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January 13th, 2019 at 9:16 am

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